Ally: Once again, we’re going to feature Christmas Wish Lists from ourselves and our favourite guest bloggers.
Since the next couple of weeks look tres busy, I thought I’d go first to ensure I didn’t miss out on the fun.
Let me start by saying I don’t actually expect to get any of these items. Since having a kidlet, Christmas isn’t really about me. Which is startling. El Jeffe and I have found ourselves saying things like, “Since the washer broke down, how about we get each other a front loader to replace our current system?” This sounds way sexier than it actually is. Evidence: A front loading washer and dryer set is currently stacked on top of each other behind me in my basement. The presents we have decided to give each other will be in our stockings and consist of underpants, socks, chap sticks, and maybe a pack of gum. If I’m good, I’ll get some Body Butter from the Body Shop. I love me some butter for the bod.
Let’s pretend that El Jeffe and I are Jay Z and Beyonce and with mad cash are going to indulge each other’s front loader fantasies.
Specifically in this colour so everyone will be sure to know I have Beats by Dr Dre.
Everyone wears them. EVERYONE.
The Gaga!
Oh, look. A clever way to insert Eminem into a post in a totally authentic manner.
Even Gwyneth says they are the perfect holiday gift. Who can dispute Gwyneth besides everyone?
I took this from the media release for the headphones:
“The people we work with spend hundreds of millions of dollars every year getting the sound exactly right.” But then, says Iovine, his emotions rising, much of what has been so carefully captured in the studio recording process has to be “dumbed down” or compressed by 20-25 per cent to be copied on to a CD, before being further compressed into an MP3 file format for playing on a computer or mobile phone with a sound processor likely to have cost just 50 cents. Sound quality is lost at every step of the process. “That’s like taking the Beatles master [recording] and playing it through a portable television,” he says with revulsion. Ramping up the similes, he points out that 80 per cent of 18- to 24-year-olds listen to music at home through computers whose speakers, typically, “make the helicopters in Apocalypse Now sound like mosquitoes”.
WHAT? I have not been capturing the full essence of Flo-Rida? Devastating news, really.
Lady Gaga’s Body:
Speaking of Lady Gaga (which I sort of did by inserting an image of her above, BLOG POLICE WHO SAY I NEVER STAY ON TOPIC). I would like her body for Christmas please. That way I too could climb on top of my car and give it a good wash similar to the way she dances on this automobile in Marry the Night.
Holy Hotsauce that is a seriously self-indulgent video (Jealous!). To see what I mean, go to the 9:25 minute mark.
So, yah, that please, Santa. The suburbs of Bedford Proper will surely be forever grateful.
Anything Balmain…Specifically This:
It is from the Spring 2009 line, so it must be on sale for nickels and dimes now, correct? I found it on my new favourite website The Fancy. I’m sure all of your smart asses have known about this website for years, while I was trolling Blind Gossip dot com (also an amazing website).
The Kristin Cavallari Dress:
I’ve been talking about this for a year. Can someone shut me up by buying if for me and shoving it in my mouth?
As previously mentioned, this Naven dress is calling my name at Foreign Affair. In my heart of hearts, I know it would look horrific on me. Which is why I have not broken Toddler G’s piggy bank to run into “The City” to purchase.
In funny news, I just checked out the Naven site and it seems they cater to Reality Stars. No surprise I love the shit they are serving me. And by shit I mean fashion gold.
Again, I have talked about this before after my last trip to House of Moda, who is the only local retailer to carry these watches. I believe in Atlantic Canada.
It could match my Beats by Dr Dre headphones! YESSSSSSSSSssssssssss.’
The “I Am T-Pain” Mic
I know what you’re thinking, friends. How can I too can this amazing and spectacular piece of machinery? It won’t be easy. This morning, I found myself at the Suburban Wally-Mart….
Back to your regular programming.
…I located a helpful WalMart employee and found the courage to ask the following question:
Ally: “*cough* um, listen, I’m going to admit that I’ll deny every asking you this question, and deny we ever even spoke. I’m hoping you can help me *cough* locate the (whisper voice) T-Pain Microphone.
Despite my claims that this was for my two year old. He knew. I knew he knew. He knew I knew he knew. It was for me. Me to say shit like, “It’s bath time, get your ass upstairs” with T-Pain auto tune production.
SO GOOD, GUYS.
He knew exactly what I was speaking of, yet…THEY DID NOT HAVE IT. Nor could he locate it at any of the other Wally-Marts in HRM.
So, that wraps it up for me (PUNNY!). I’m sure I’ll steal the ideas of the guest bloggers to come. In the meantime, enjoy the holiday spirit and try not to get physically violent while out holiday shopping.
L-A: The only thing I added today is my fancy Listmas jpeg I made with the photoshop. Which is for all the Listmas posts. Dollars to donuts my design teacher is cringing right now. Anyway, I’ll share my wish list later this week. And then we’ll share the guests lists. Fun! Because as I said to our favourite past guest bloggers, unpaid staff and interns: it is that time of year again, the time for lists! Wish lists, top ten lists, year in review lists. Every kind of list your heart desires all mushed into one month. As a year round list maker, this is a pretty special time for me. Aside from the getting and giving of gifts, births of saviors, etc. Anyway, the rules of Listmas, as Ally followed quite nicely are this: anything your heart desires, sky(mall)’s the limit, but at least one thing has to be purchased locally. Because we’re big fans of the shopping locally, especially during the holidays.
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