It’s like Christmas for Hipsters

Ally: Let’s be serious. I’ve been a shitty effing blogger lately. L-A has completely been covering my ass on all fronts. I owe her not only a box of wine, but like all of the boxes of wine in the world. I could go on about work being busy, me having a sinus infection (again) and being a baby momma blah, blah, blah…but you don’t come here for that crap. So let’s just sum it up by saying I suck and if I wasn’t so darn good looking, L-A would have fired me already.

When I did finally get a moment to sit in front of the computer and catch up on fashion and gossip (seriously, Lindsay? Seriously? For eff’s  sake), I was pleasantly surprised to find extensive coverage of the Twenty8Twelve Spring 2011 show. Glee! And not the show! The emotion! Glee!

According to fashion gospel Style dot com, “Sienna and Savannah Miller called their Spring collection Jericho, inspired by Joni Mitchell’s album Don Juan’s Reckless Daughter.” If it wasn’t Sienna, I would totally call them out for being “try-hards”, but it’s Sienna, so let’s buy it.

To put you in the mood while you look at the clothes, here’s Joni Mitchell’s Jericho:

That’s…just not…I hate it. Sorry.

More my speed.

(All photos sourced from Style.com unless otherwise noted)

Let’s start with what I loved.

I love this look more than L-A loves listening to “Whole Foods music” while guzzling vodka lemonade through a twizzler straw.

If we know anything about me, it’s that I have shit taste in music and I am a sucker for anything flouncy in the skirt area. There were tons of tutu dresses/skirts in the S2010 collection. I was happy.

Patterned tutu!

Really enjoy the stripes (I think L-A will as well) and the deep cut on the sides. Very Sienna.

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I think L-A has an outfit like the one above. A cute full skirt with a striped top. Actually, I think L-A has a hundred striped tops. CHALLENGE: L-A must wear nautical styles for ONE FULL WEEK. Who’s in?

This is casual Sunday wear. My heart swells just looking at it.

And this is how you wear shorts to work. Minus the shoes. The shoes are hideous. Really. Hideous. I love the denim rope belt. Why didn’t I think of that?

And I loved the bohotastic styles. This one especially. Perfect for summer/spring evenings sipping bottles of wine on my back deck. I miss summer already. It’s not the same sitting outside in your snowsuit. I mean, I’ll try it out, but I’m sure I won’t like it.

So, I loved the above, but if I’m being honest? This is not a serious design collection. It’s…simple. Too simple. And I think Sienna’s style is way more complex than this. I mean, this look for example?

This is like Miley Cyrus shizz for Walmart. Let’s be clear: I’d buy it. But I’d think I was buying Miley’s crap.

And please explain to me, Sienna, how this goes with the Joni Mitchell “theme”. Cause I ain’t seeing Joni in this.

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Overall, I love a few pieces, and hate a lot. I can’t even defend them against the wrath of L-A. I am now going to crawl under my desk as she pounds away on the keyboard, empowered by a Jost energy drink, tearing Sienna and her sister a new one. Speaking of, I do enjoy their collection night attire:

Although, Sienna almost looks embarrassed here. Sort of like when Estrella Archs walked out with Lindsay Lohan after the disaster Ungaro showing last year…

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L-A: I…..I don’t even know where to begin.  It’s not completely horrible. That’s something! And unlike Ally’s other favourite celebrity designer, I have no Golden Girl references to make here. Another something! I feel like I’m growing as a person.

However. The Hilary Duff melodrama?? On a Wednesday? That makes me want to go jump in front of the damn street cleaner (which, seriously HRM? Does it need to do laps around my house? And does it really need to clean the streets around my house every two days?).  My personal growth does not extend to Ally’s music.

Back to Twenty8Twelve (word to the up-and-coming-famous-rich-girl-designers: think of better clothing company names!): the flouncy skirts are cute. Some of the outifts I could see on Ally (I mean that in a good way). I usually dig stripes, but I didn’t love that weird tank dress.  And while I’ve never been good at judging the overall cohesiveness of a collection, I can say that this one has some less than cohesive moments.  Mostly, it’s clothes I expect to see at H&M (I feel like I have seen them at H&M before) and they probably cost a hell of a lot more.

To end off my picture free addition to the post: Striped shirts for a week? Bring it on. That is a challenge I can do. Not only can I do it, but I can still function in society without looking like a total crazy lady (because I do have to leave my house and go see people every day).

French Sailors! Mimes! Picasso wannabes! Watch your backs. Starting Monday, I am bringing the nautical stripe and I am bringing it hard. I will even find a way to involve a boat.

Parenthood: It can’t all be crossword puzzles and Pac-Man!

Pearl of China by Anchee Min