America’s Got Talent: Final Destination

The top ten has finally arrived. Had I known this moment wouldn’t arrive until September, I probably wouldn’t have gotten on board with America’s Got Talent. And I especially wouldn’t have gotten on board had I known that out of the top ten, only four acts would move on. FOUR! What the hell? What a waste of my summer! I’ve been watching for weeks and weeks, I’ve sat through excruciatingly lame performances. And I finally get to what is supposed to be the best of the best and they reduce that number by more than half after one round??? This show needs a format more like that of American Idol.

Let’s look at the ten acts that performed on Tuesday night, six of whom will not be moving on.

Studio One Young Beast Society
The lengthy name isn’t the only thing I’ve disliked about this group in the past. I didn’t really want them in the finals and I thought they made it in over some more deserving acts. This performance changed my mind though. Some of their tricks rivaled those of groups that perform on America’s Best Dance Crew, a standard I never thought they reached before.
Christina and Ali
Oh god. I’m sorry, but these girls just aren’t good. They’re not. Their performances sound like small-town karaoke, not a nationally televised talent competition. There’s nothing they can do it about it, either. They’re very sweet and seem to work very hard, but their voices just aren’t strong enough. They never, ever should have gotten this far. The judges are cruel to even lead them on with positive comments.
Jeremy Vanschoonhoven
Knowing that only four acts would move on, I didn’t even feel like watching this kid’s performance. It’s just not my thing.
Taylor Matthews
Taylor is an OK singer and if the performers were being eliminated one at a time, I’d expect to see him last a couple rounds. But he’s not top four material, so his performance felt like a waste of time. His cheesy song choice sunk his ship even further.
Anna and Patryk
These kids are good, but I didn’t expect them to make the top four. Though after Anna’s wipeout down the stairs and her graceful recovery, I’m not sure. It was a very fun and charming performance, and America loves kids. They could squeeze through. It was kind of heartbreaking to see her cry at the end, too.
Enrique Iglesias
This guy has no shot at making it into the top four, he relied on autotune waaaaay too much. Oh, wait…
Fighting Gravity
These guys are frontrunners, and obviously deserve to be in the top four. It wasn’t my favorite Fighting Gravity performance, but it was still pretty freakin’ cool.
Michael Grimm
I’ve liked this guy from the beginning, and I wanted to see him go far. I didn’t love his song choice this week. I would have loved to see him do something more contemporary, like a Bruno Mars or Jason Mraz song. Still, the guy can sing.
Michael Grasso
Ugh, magic. Seeing this guy make it to the final four would only further prove what a mistake it was for me to watch this show. Magic lovers, what do you think – is this guy any good?
Prince Poppycock
I love Prince Poppycock. The effort that goes into each performance just blows me away. The costumes, hair and makeup. The sets. The singing! I love Prince Poppycock because he doesn’t just have a fantastic voice, he’s created a whole character around it. I want this guy to win.
Jackie Evancho
There’s talent, and there’s entertainment. Jackie is very, very talented. So talented. But does she entertain me? Not really. I still think she deserves to be in the final four because the show is called “America’s Got Talent” and that’s what she has. But would I go see her show? No.

So only four acts can continue on. Ridiculous, I know. My choices are Jackie Evancho, Prince Poppycock, Michael Grimm and Fighting Gravity. And I’d love to see Prince Poppycock and Fighting Gravity battle it out in the end. Right now I’m leaning towards Prince Poppycock for the win. Who do you want to see in the final four? Who should win?

Enchiladas, Where Have You Been All My Life?

America’s Got Talent: Four Square