But Mommm: Role Reversal

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“Mommy is there something big going on at work soon?”

“Hmmm I’m not sure, like what sweetie?”

“I don’t know Mom, just something that will change things?”

As we lay in her bed she reached out and stroked my hair.

There was a seriousness in her eyes as she looked at me with a certain facial expression that has become incredibly familiar. It’s her look that tells me that something has been on her mind.

“Well the only thing I can think of is that a big company bought my company. So in a few weeks the name of the company I work for will change and who knows, my job could even change.”

“So is that why whenever we bump into people they ask you if you’re going to be okay?”

And there it was. The thing that had likely been playing on her mind for awhile. For weeks now, whenever we run into anybody I get asked about the Bell Aliant privatization and how it’s going to affect me. Nine times out of ten, people ask me if I think I’m going to be okay. Until that moment I hadn’t really thought about how that must sound to eight-year-old ears that have no understanding of the business world.

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“Yes that’s exactly why people have been asking me that. There’s going to be a lot of change going on at work and people care about how that makes me feel.”

And in one quick moment, our roles completely changed.

“Well Mommy, I’m glad that’s all it is. You’re one of the smartest people I know and I know you’ll be fine no matter what happens. I promise it’ll be okay. I really love you. Everything will be fine and if things don’t work out at work you can just spend more time at home with me!”

I smiled and whispered a quiet, “thank you.” I pulled her close and snuggled her in the dark until she was almost asleep. Usually I wouldn’t stay that long but in that moment, I didn’t want to let her go.

It brought me back to those first few weeks after she was born when I was desperately searching for some kind of acknowledgement that all of the work I was doing – the feedings, the changing, the sleepless nights – meant something. And then, around six weeks, she smiled the most real, beautiful, non-gas-related smile while looking straight in my eyes. It went right to my heart.

The other night gave me the same beautiful feeling in my heart. After years of supporting her and doing my best to help her see the glass-is-half-full side of life, she suddenly says the only words I really needed to hear as I navigate this interesting stage in my career.

My baby’s growing up.

Deanna is a Mom of three, wife, marketer and blogger – lover of travel, morning coffee, family time, belly laughs, good friends and uninterrupted showers! Follow her on twitter @DeannaCMiller

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