I hope those candles aren’t real.
I’ve been hating on Glee a lot this season, I know. And I’m still unlikely to review it next season, since I hate being an angrypants every Tuesday night. But – BUT! – I actually didn’t mind last night’s episode. It had quite a few decent, even pleasant moments. So let’s recap.
How Will I Know?
“How Will I Know” was actually a lovely performance, and likely the first Glee song I’ll download on iTunes in a long time. I loved how the four voices blended together and the slowed down version was perfect and appropriate. I thought the vigil to Whitney Houston in the locker was, er, a tad much. But Glee always goes over the top.
It was a little odd that we’re only just realizing that the entire glee club has been down in the dumps over Whitney’s passing for a couple of months. But I guess there was no way to do a Whitney tribute that acknowledged her death without having to make that concession.
Kurt met a guy at the music store who was nowhere near as cute as Blaine, but was an instant and rabid fan of Kurt. So because he played straight to Kurt’s ego, there was a little spark. I had to agree with the overeager teen on one point – no one has done Whitney’s fantastic song “One Moment In Time” justice. I loved that song when I was in high school.
Apparently Kurt and Blaine’s relationship has become too chaste – he told Rachel they were suffering from Lesbian Bed Death as a way to justify his flirty ego-boosting text messaging with music store guy.
I Wanna Dance With Somebody
Quinn wants to dance with somebody too – anybody, really, because she’s just dying to dance. Or walk. Teen Jesus noticed that she was kind of bummed, because I guess weeks of physical therapy and no progress means she’s no longer got that sunny Pollyanna disposition. So Teen Jesus accompanied Quinn to her next physio session.
Saving All My Love For You
I love this song too! I knew the Whitney tribute episode would at least knock it out of the park on the music front. This is the least I’ve hated Glee all year. Quinn and Teen Jesus sound great together. They have the same vocal chemistry she had with Sam. The song was very sexy and sweet.
The ladies all gushed in the bathroom about Quinn and Joe’s sexy performance, but Quinn was a total Debbie Downer. He’d pulled away from a potential kiss at physio, and Quinn assumed it was because he was grossed out by her and her wheelchair. Gee, Quinn, maybe he was waiting for a more romantic setting? Or maybe it’s because he’s Teen Jesus.
Actually, that was it. And he went to talk to Sam about “feelings in his pants”. GROSS. Ugh. Really, Joe? You’re asking Sam about whether you’re supposed to wait until marriage to have sex? Sam threw tattoos back in Joe’s face – apparently the Bible is against those too. (That must be news to all the meatheads I see with tattoos of crosses.) He also mentioned the Internet. It was weird, real weird. Sam said he’s a new kind of Christian who prays, but laughs at silly rules too.
I Get So Emotional
Meanwhile, Will was being a thorn in Emma’s side by insisting that their wedding be in May to accommodate the glee kids, even though it would be impossible to plan. Yet another example of how weird it is that these kids hold such an important place in Will Schuester’s life. This is what happens when your best man is a child.
It’s Not Right, But It’s OK
Eventually, Blaine noticed all the texts Kurt was getting and looked at his phone. Kurt said it was innocent, Blaine said it was cheating. That led to this performance. I have a weird love/hate relationship with this song. I think the lyrics are incredibly stupid, yet I know them all and would never skip over it when it came up on my Whitney greatest hits CD. This performance, though? Unarguably lame.
I kinda liked the whole glee club singing “You were making a foo-ooo-oool of meeeeee” directly to Kurt. Let’s all judge him together! Can we get him a scarlet letter to wear as well?
I Have Nothing
Graduating brings up a lot of emotions. Rachel and Santana realized they like each other. Burt realized he’s really going to miss his kid, even though he spends most of his time in D.C. lately because Glee just remembered that he’s an elected official. Anyway, it actually developed into a very sweet moment. Of course I didn’t tear up a little, shut your face.
Then Kurt went to rehearsal and sang “I Have Nothing” to Blaine. It, er, emphasized the girlier tones in Kurt’s voice. And the shrillest tones to his voice. So, that happened. Does breaking glass win back a boyfriend? I don’t know how these things work, I’ve never text-cheated.
Kurt and Blaine went for couples’ counseling with their admittedly unqualified guidance counselor Miss Pillsbury. They aired a few petty grievances before getting to the good stuff – Blaine has been distant because Kurt has been a total selfish bitch about New York and NYADA. I can’t believe they needed Emma to get that one out in the open, doesn’t it seem kind of obvious? (Also, it still seems weird to me that Kurt is older than Blaine.)
Speaking of communications issues for couples, Will tried to plan his wedding with Emma at a campground. It was time for Will to face the fact that he has a creepy connection with his students. Or, for him to realize that these kids will show up for his November wedding because they have a creepy connection to him/because November is sweeps month and they’ll need a big reunion episode.
When Joe went to physio with Quinn, he, er, had that feeling in his pants that he talked to Sam about while he was helping her. It was funny. Then they talked about relationships and God and stuff. It was sort of weird – does Joe really think he can’t be religious and also have a girlfriend?
My Love Is Your Love
This might be my favorite Whitney song. I love how mellow and fun it is. It was a good choice for one of Glee‘s quintessential auditorium episode-closing numbers.
Overall, I thought this was a decent episode of Glee. Granted, most of my affection stems from my love of Whitney Houston and her musical catalog. But they did her tunes justice, and none of the storylines offended me. These days, that’s a win. What did you guys think?
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