11:11 am - Sunday, August 18 2019
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Love Immunized

I kind of feel bad about yesterday’s post.  I feel bad that I was busy feeling sorry for myself when my baby was going from “coming down with a pesky cold” to being in a full blown respiratory disaster.  He currently sounds like an old lady who has been smoking all her life, and his laughs and cries are completely indistinguishable from his barking cough.

My baby is sick.

My heart is broken.

I really am amazed at how love changes things.  I totally admit to dreading the thought of my child getting sick – obviously because I don’t want him to suffer, but also because the thought of caring for someone who is sick is just so overwhelming.  Just think about it: staying up all night, cleaning up sick, likely catching it yourself… It all just sounds too hard.

But when someone I love actually gets sick, there is nothing I would rather do than take care of them.  It is hard, but it is also so natural (kind of like Motherhood).

Despite my utter exhaustion, I managed to joyfully* (not to be confused with happily) spend the majority of last night awake comforting, soothing and snuggling my baby.

Every time Cameron coughed, my heart broke.  Every time he whimpered in misery, I wanted to cry.  How could I even continue to think about my sleep frustrations when my poor little child was suffering so much?  There is nothing I wouldn’t do to take that sickness from him.  But, there is nothing I can do.  Nothing but try to comfort my little baby.

And that’s just it about love, isn’t it?  Love isn’t simply sympathetic – recognizing the pain of others.  Love isn’t simple empathetic – sharing in that pain.  Love is being so broken from that pain that our heart knows nothing else but to act.  Love is making chicken noodle soup.  Love is cleaning up vomit.  Love is changing diapers.  Love is staying up all night.

Cam and I waiting to see a doctor.
His poor eyes look so tired and sick. But he’s putting on a happy face.
iPhone photo taken today.
10 months, 4 weeks old.

*Those whose minds are shaped by selfless thoughts give joy when they speak or act.  Joy follows them like a shadow that never leaves them. – Buddha

Laura (@LauraORourke) is a photographer who lives in Halifax, Nova Scotia. A wife to Dan and a mother to Cameron, she spends her free time blogging and reading. Her blog finds its home at http://miraclesofamily.blogspot.com. Her photography can be found at http://www.olalaphotography.com.

About Laura O'Rourke

I’m Laura. Wife to Dan. Mama to Cameron and Gavin. Blogger. Photographer. I’ve been declared “baby crazy” by my husband. I’ve been blogging since 2003 when I was a teenager. My first blog post ever begged forgiveness for all the future blog posts that would follow. Consider that still in effect. I met my husband through blogging, I planned a wedding while blogging, and we tweeted the births of both of our sons. Consider this my memoir, my legacy, my letter to my children and my hand reaching out to other Moms. I love being a wife. I love being a Mom. I love blogging. And I can’t wait to meet you.


The views and opinions expressed in this content are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of haligonia.ca.


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