It’s the first blog post of the New Year and one of my resolutions for 2011 is to get back to blogging.
Actually. That’s a lie. I haven’t specifically resolved to blog more.
In fact, I hate resolutions. To me, it makes more sense – if I want to change something in my life – to just do it. Now. Why wait until January 1st? Or next week? Or Monday? Or “this is my last drink”. Or coffee. Or cigarette. Or whatever.
How are you feeling right now?
Drag the emoji to where you're at today.
Somewhere in the middle — and that's okay.
However.
I have decided to make a change. I’m not sure why January 2011 is all of a sudden auspicious. Perhaps I found 2010 a bit overwhelming and I want to shake it off and start clean. Perhaps I was just lazy over Christmas. Perhaps, like the millions of other people who make resolutions for the New Year, I just needed a starting point: a definite marker to say, “On this day I changed that.”
Perhaps.
If only to measure how long it lasts.
Nevertheless.
My resolution? Such as it is?
Actually, it’s my new mantra:
One at a time.
One thing, one job, one person, one activity, one place, one time, one now.
Some of you will understand what I mean: the feeling of tail-chasing; of never being finished; of never being satisfied; of one eye on the future; of a palpable ennui even in the midst of endless swirling activity. Dizzying.
I want to slow down the roller coaster.
‘One at a time’ is kind of like ‘living in the moment’, but it’s less esoteric. More practical.
Yes, I think 2010 nearly killed me. Too much stuff.
Ok, 2011 will still be full but I want it to feel different. Although I love everything I do, I know that when I am doing whatever it is – be it practicing music, planning a production, teaching, writing a finding application, having drinks with friends, or even writing this blog post – my mind is on something else. What’s next? What else do I have to do? And what’s after that?
And at a certain level I can accept that this is how I am: attracted to shiny things, a need for a variety of stimuli. Heck, I’m pretty sure I’ve written on topic before.
But man, I’m pooped. Physically, mentally and soulfully.
So.
Starting with a bit of yoga this morning I resolve to try to do things one at a time.
After all:
There is only one me.
