Arrested Groundhog: It is with sadness that we learned today that Shubenacadie Sam has been sentenced to death for not predicting the correct end to winter one time too many. Sam’s supporters argued that this year, in fact, he DID correctly predict six more weeks of winter. Even meteorologist Peter Coade protested that Sam’s record was as good as any weather person’s but the judge was not moved. Meanwhile a Pittsburgh lawyer has recommended the death penalty for Punxsutawney Phil. Phil was very concerned when he heard of the demise of his Canadian friend Sam. Meanwhile in other related news, the Cogswell Interchange will be coming down April 2nd and the Casino will be erecting a new building on the site.
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