The Amazing Race – Great Scot!

This week on The Amazing Race, the teams headed to Scotland and I was reminded that, really, South Arfica’s infamous vuvuzelas aren’t all that bad – because bagpipes are SO MUCH WORSE.

The Roadblock in Scotland required one team member to complete a bagpipe performance, and man, was it annoying. Luckily, it was over very quickly.

The funniest part of the Roadblock was watching Meghan react to the bagpiper putting his mouth all over HER bagpipe as he was instructing her. Ew! I don’t care about being rude, I would have wiped it off with my sleeve.

Tasty Puddin’ vs. Whiskey Rollin’

The Detour required teams to choose between preparing disgusting haggis (Full disclosure: I have had a small bite of haggis before. It upset me because it tasted like Thanksgiving stuffing AND I LOVE STUFFING.) or rolling barrels of whiskey 200m. Guys, 200 meters is not that far, right? Half a running track. I would have gone for the barrel rolling.

OK, so it was more than one barrel and they were obviously heavy. Bates and Anthony actually CARRIED them, which was insane. Still, it seemed like a better option than jamming god knows what into a large condom made of stomach.

Bates and Anthony did finish first, and they U-turned Meghan and Joey. Poor Team YouTube just can’t catch a break. Damn alliances! Max and Katie then U-turned the roller derby moms. These teams are so dumb, they’re not U-turning the most threatening teams, they’re just protecting their pals. Bates and Anthony should have U-turned Max and Katie, or no one at all. Also, I think it’s pretty dumb to have a Double U-turn in the same leg as a Speed Bump. I miss the good ol’ days of The Amazing Race, when there were none of these dumb extras and teams had to walk around the world barefoot, uphill.

Max and Katie actually ended up coming in first, and winning ten grand each. So there you go, Bates and Anthony. Enjoy not having $10,000, suckas. They of course came in second, and the country singing blonds came in third.

Last Place Race

Mona and Beth had to bowl a strike to complete the Speed Bump, but Meghan and Joey are crappy at running the race so they all started the Detour at the same time. Not surprisingly, the roller derby players were much faster at rolling the heavy barrels than the hipsters who make a career out of posting videos online.

Mona and Beth arrived in fourth place, and Meghan and Joey were eliminated. I ran hot and cold on them as a team, but I definitely would have preferred them to stay in over a team like Max and Katie. I’m still rooting for the roller derby moms to win, but it feels like a long shot. I can’t believe next week is the season finale. I just haven’t gotten into this season at all.

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Quick Sackvillan Test # 105 (Pizza Map)