ANTM Cycle 13: Mercifully comes to a close

L-A: Tonight is the wrap up of what is possibly the worst cycle of ANTM (PopWatch thought a recent episode was one of the worst ever). I sometimes enjoy vapid reality based television about squealy girls who just want to model (but never ever land a modeling job after they win. Perhaps they are too commercial?), but this cycle lost me early. Unlucky thirteen? I don’t understand the plight of the petite? Or did Tyra’s gimmicks and use of the word “smeyes” (which she spells “smize”…which makes even less sense than making the word up to begin with).

I’m sort of glad I gave up on the show early on in the cycle, because I would have lost my shit during the blackface episode, I mean, the totally culturally sensitive and not at all problematichapa means half in Hawaiian” episode. Actually, I missed out on some absolutely beautiful moments by not catching that episode. Like when she was told she would be half Tibetan, Erin said:
I have a very vague knowledge of Tibet, except that it needs to be freed.

It’s moments like that when I really love Top Model. It never claimed to be profound and the smrt girls usually get auf’ed (oops…wrong fashion reality show) long before the finale. But despite the bon mots, I’m still reeling over the blackface. What the what modeling world? I’m looking at you too French Vogue. I am baffled that we are even asking the question if blackface is okay.  I think Larry Wilmore on the Daily Show answered the question nicely: No.  (Had to watch a lot of Jon Stewart to find that clip. But that’s okay. I have a massive geeky crush on that man and his brain).

But, as I tuned into the last half minute/previews for next week (A Channel happened to be the last thing I had on and I was about to watch my Glee), I was a little bit delighted to see that Nicole and Laura were going to make that final runway walk. They were totally my favourites and they actually appear to take good pictures.  Nicole is an odd duck – she had me at bloody eyeball/couldn’t understand why the other kids thought it was weird to use a wheelbarrow to carry your books to school – but the odd ducks seem to photograph way better than the typically pretty girls. Remember Heather with Asperger’s?  Great photos, but ultimately kicked off because she couldn’t manage to navigate her way around Shanghai or film a Cover Girl ad. Then again, Tootie Saleisha won that year, so really, Heather didn’t stand a chance.

But I digress.

This is the first time in ages that I’ve actually liked Tyra’s choices for the final two girls. In fact, it’s the first time in awhile that I wasn’t completely pissed off.  Auntie Fashion might be on to something about Tyra winning back some viewers – I may actually watch Top Model tonight. Although, I can’t decide who I want to win. Adorable farm girl or slightly creepy but takes a great photo? Like Battle of the Blades on Monday, I think I’ll be happy with whoever wins (okay, not completely true…I was totally rooting for Salé and Simpson. How could I not? Jamie Salé is just too darn adorable!).


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