Dusting off our Prom Dresses

AllyG: Can I just say that I am having so much fun during awards season? I’m into lists lately, so I’ll break down the reasons why I love awards season as follows:

Swoooooooooon

  • I get to say the following to my husband, “Honey, can you pick up a box of wine tonight? I have to work. L-A and I are live-tweeting the Grammys”.
  • I stay up a whole extra hour until NINE O’CLOCK which is when the red carpet shuts ‘er down. This means I go to sleep with images of Billy Bush fresh in my mind…

Swoooooooooooooon

The big night is March 7th, which is of course Oscar night. We can’t wait. L-A and I have agreed to don our prom dresses and live-tweet the Oscar red carpet while drinking the cheapest sparkling wine we can get our greasy hands on. At least I think L-A is serious about wearing her prom dress, otherwise that would be super embarrassing for me. I even tried mine on. It totally fits. First thing in the morning. When I haven’t eaten anything. For the previous three days. Hopefully L-A’s prom dress will stay on a bit longer than the first time she wore it, hardy har har! Ahhhhh…

Anyway, the Oscar noms were announced today and I don’t really give an eff about this year’s nominees except for anyone involved with Precious (haven’t seen it, but the trailer shakes me to my core).

In all seriousness, this movie needs to sweep the Oscars. Just for the trailer alone.

We’re more excited about who is going to be this year’s big disappointment a la Jennifer Hudson during the Dreamgirls year. I fear it may be my girl Anna K.  I loved Anna Kendrick’s Globe dress, but others seemed to hate it.

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Hopefully her Oscar selection will be more universally appreciated.

It feels like a boring year, non? None of the big powerhouses are nominated. I mean, Meryl, sure…but she doesn’t really bring it fashion-wise. You know? Am I wrong?

Moving away from this for a second, I’ve been having sweet dreams about a certain Jason Wu dress I saw in my Feb issue of Vogue. I couldn’t find the photo that appeared in the magazine (which is tragic because it paired the dress with the most adorable Dolce & Gabbana booties), but I did find an image of the dress. Behold:

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Ooh! Yay! I found the booties!

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I need a moment.

L-A: Before you give up on this blog completely, can I just say that Billy Bush will NEVER be an official something here at FPQT. That one is all Ally.

Now, as much as I love popping open a cold one and live-tweeting with Ally, I have to tell you, I was bored with the Grammys. It was a long and painful reminder of why I haven’t watched awards shows in ages.  The performances did little for me. The mashups were tedious and not even Pink’s sparkly Jedi cape/Cirque du Soleil routine excited me.  I’m not sure what it takes to get me interested, but clearly you need to bring more than a bedazzled crotch and hang upside down over the audience.  I can get that in Vegas seven nights of the week.

Can I just say how disappointed I was that all I got of the lifetime achievement award for L.Cohen was a 10 second clip? Seriously? Michael Jackson gets a 3D Celine Dion studded extravaganza and I can’t get even get 30 seconds of Leonard. For shame.  (Speaking of Michael Jackson, is it crude to say that his kid Paris rocked the suit/ruffled blouse? Because she did).  Also, no sign of my pretend boyfriend MCA, even though the Beastie Boys had a nomination. I had to make do with Lonely Island for my geek crush.

As for Gaga, well, she was all Good Witch Glinda on the red carpet…except instead of a giant bubble, it takes three people to get Gaga out of the car and onto the carpet.

I will give credit where credit is due: I was not expecting the Elton John moment. Golf claps. Otherwise, I just expect the odd outfits.  I wondered how you could top the MMVA flaming boobs. I thought that it might involve the words “fire crotch”, but as a reader pointed out, it’d probably be a sweatsuit and ponytail. Now that would shock.

Coco Rocha showed off her own design on the runway.

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While I wasn’t blown away (for me, I didn’t love the shoulders), I didn’t hate it either. And frankly, I’m sure it’s about seventeen hundred percent better than what I’d manage to make for myself if I attempted to design something. Oh, I talk a good game, but if I were to actually design something, I’d be sending you down the runway in something about as lovely as a LiLo Ungaro original.

Anyway, I just hope Hollywood brings it for the Oscars. I imagine I’m going to get a lot of nude coloured dresses that will wash out celebrities and bore me to tears, but hope springs eternal.  I’m pretty sure the only thing I can count on is something odd from Drew as she golly-gee-willikers her way around.  Thank god she’s not nominated for an Oscar. Because her and Taylor Swift can take their Sally Field schtick and shove…okay. I’m getting irate. I’m going to bed now.  I’ll just save the rest of this rant for my coffee with Ally tomorrow.

The Choice To Turn It Off

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