AllyG: Do you know what I hate? Well, a lot of things, but today I hate the phrase “bathing suit season!!!!” It’s the WORST when I read this crap on magazine covers, “Lose 200 pounds before BATHING SUIT SEASON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” But whatever, it’s summer. When people wear bathing suits. Therefore, we shall discuss.

While I hate that phrase, I do love the new suits this season (I MEAN FASHION SEASON!), particularly the one piece action that’s happening all over the place.

So, admittedly, I cannot fit into the following from Victoria’s Secret, but I can appreciate its value.

My mother would say that this suit is, “Not very forgiving!” which is a good thing since I have difficulty apologizing to my bathing suits for my fat arse.

One of my friends at work (Whaddup Nat?) raised a very interesting point today. While Paris Hilton is generally despised universally, she looks incredible in a bathing suit. Look, I’m not happy about it either. I’m basically wearing a snowsuit to the beach THIS SEASON. It is, however, a sad reality that we all have to accept. Don’t believe me?

Yah. It’s good. I feel AWFUL about it, but it’s good.

I’m always a fan of Old Navy’s mix and match selection. The suits are cheap, fun and there are tons of bright colours and patterns to choose from. Let me show you the fun of mixing and matching!

Cute, non? These pictures are huge, but I have faith that L-A will fix them for me. I’m like the spoiled child she always rolls her eyes over but who is secretly her favorite. [L-A note: fixed! I couldn’t crop the pics, so I put them side by side. Hopefully this works on all computers. It works on my wee 13″ macbook. Also: no eye rolling and no secret that Ally is a favourite.]

The one bathing suit that I really, really wish I could fit into THIS SEASON is the Deux Fm bikini found at Love, Me Boutique. The bikinis from this line are beyond precious and eco friendly. For reals! Made from remnant fabric, nautical rope and organic cotton, the suit has a really cute bow shaped top (similar to the bows that LADY GAGA wears in her hair!). It comes in three colours: red, black and eggplant. [L-A note: they come in other colours too! I just can’t recall what.]

Deux FM is the love child of Anna Gilkerson, a Nova Scotia native who studied in New York and Italy and recently made her way back to God’s Country in 2006. Come to Liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiife!

Beat that closing, L-A.

Note: L-A and I take no responsibility for the clothes worn in the Come to Liiiiiiiiiiife video. Particulary the overuse of the “windbreaker”.

L-A: Okay,  I can’t beat that ending. I’m impressed with that video. I had no idea that the province paid for a whole song. I couldn’t watch the whole video. Maybe it’s because it’s low quality internets, but it looks like it was made in 1995 rather than 2005. Just saying.

But this post isn’t a critique of Nova Scotia tourism. Nope. This is about looking like ye olde bathing beauty:

Aren’t those girls are having a gay old time? But let’s keep it a bit local, shall we:

Looking good and having a ball (sorry, couldn’t help myself) in Canada’ Ocean Playground. I’m impressed that these girls looked that jolly because I don’t care what you say (I’m looking at you J.Lau), the ocean waters around Halifax are freezing. But just because you can probably get hypothermia in July (I’m only sort of kidding) doesn’t mean you shouldn’t looking darling. And that is why I’m in love with Michael Kors’ bathing suits from his Spring 2009 Ready to Wear Collection:

Look at that! Retro without looking frumpy! Although, I can’t say I love the fourth suit. Actually, I don’t like it at all. I hope that suit was created out of leftovers from his other suits.  But back to focus on the ones I do like. They cover your ass and the skirts on the first two aren’t totally frumpified bathing suits with skirts that they try to dump on the full figured girls. I was going to get a picture, but y’all know what I’m talking about. They are not pretty and everyone deserves a pretty bathing suit. Which is why I’m going to let you know that H&M is in on this retro suit action, just in case your pocket book isn’t fat enough for Michael Kors suits. Although, I’m not convinced some of those high waisted suits will look good on everyone. As for the full figured gal, I’m going to give props to Elle Canada for an editorial featuring a full-figured model in their July issue (to which I have a short subscription thanks to a box of Honey Nut Cheerios) and for not once congratulating themselves on using a “full figured” model (because let’s face it, that is what magazines tend to do):

Nary a frumpy suit in sight in that editorial spread.

Moving along, what is a trip to the beach without accessories? Don’t bothering answering that.  Here’s the accessories:

Okay, okay. You’re probably saying, “hey L-A, what up with the bathing cap?” And I’m telling you that I saw some très adorable retro looking bathing caps at Lady Luck Boutique in the Hydrostone Market today. I’m not talking about the kind that Michael Phelps might wear, I’m talking about the ones from days of yore. Or that you might see on your Great Aunt when she winters in Florida. Because seriously, I think that if paired with the right suit and the right attitude, you too can rock that look. I’m not saying I can rock that look, but you might be able to do it.

Of course, you need something to wear to the beach, like maybe a cute dress (that can double as a skirt, I kid you not) from Whirl Girl (also available at Love, Me Boutique):

Or, if you are so inclined, a maxi dress will do the trick just nicely. I recently spotted some simple ones being sold for $35 at Sweet Pea Boutique on Queen St.  And if you want to argue that a dress is not an accessory, I am going to argue that it is if the whole point of the day is to go somewhere public and not wear said dress. Just saying.

Next up, a cute bag to carry your towel, sunscreen (SPF 110 if you’re me), and a magazine (if you’re Ally, it’ll be a copy of Us magazine. Without fail. I’m pretty sure that’s what she gave me as a wedding present. And it was awesome because I brought it with me to the beach at White Point Resort on my mini-honeymoon):

It is made out of a sail! How fantastically nautical! And to make it even better, when I did a little google for bags made from sailcloth, the first company I came across was Force 8 Sails from Nova Scotia. Where can you buy them? Bedford (at Maples Decor, which is….somewhere in Bedford). Of course. What is up with Bedford? (Ally, I think we need to do a full post on the style out in the ‘burbs of HRM). There are other spots to buy the bags in the province and across the country, but Bedford is all we Haligonians have got. That’s okay, the bags are almost cute enough for me to hop on the number 80 out to the ends of the earth Bedford.

Since it is the beach, we give you full permission to wear flip flops with abandon. I don’t care what they are. You want something that doesn’t give you a blister and that you can hose down at the end of the day. I recently bought Havaianas on the cheap, but seriously, they’re just flip flops with a good marketing campaign.

Now, whether or not you’re in Nova Scotia, if you have a sunny day and access to a beach/river bank/pool, you should knock off early and go there. Enjoy our short few months of summer weather while you can.