Survivor – Yo Mama

This was a rather predictable episode of Survivor, but I like how this season is shaping up. There are some big personalities and LOTS of drama. On the White Collar tribe, it’s all passive-aggressive snark.

On the Blue Collar tribe, it’s LOTS of yelling. On the No Collar tribe, it’s all hurt feelings and being left out. Oof, these people are really living up to their stereotypes. Good work, editors!

White Collars

The White Collar tribe has focused their dislike on Shirin, who walked around naked that one time and is interested in wildlife. (Speaking of nudity, did we see Max AT ALL this week?)

Shirin was like, pretty into watching monkeys, and talking to monkeys, and talking about the monkeys. She told a story about watching the monkeys, you know… do it. But, guys? Isn’t that at least kind of interesting? It’s like watching a nature documentary except IRL! I feel like I could get along with Shirin.

While most of the tribe looked for the Hidden Immunity Idol, Carolyn sat by the fire and relaxed because HA HA SHE ALREADY HAS IT, SUCKERS. Kind of a stupid move there, Carolyn. You should have at least faked looking for a while.

Joaquin really, really hates Shirin because she’s “a relentless, paranoid woman.” He likes Tyler though, because “that’s my boy.” Cool story, bro. I hate your face and the way people call you “Wok” for short.

Blue Collars

From the edit we’re getting, it looks like the Blue Collar tribe yells four times as much as the other two tribes combined. There are six people on this tribe, and only two of them still seem normal – Sierra and Kelly. Keep your heads down and pray for a merge, y’all. Because you’re working with a bunch of knuckleheads.

First, there was Dan throwing out a “your mother is a ho” crack at Rodney. What the hell, dude? That guy is from Boston. Don’t joke about Boston mothers. Rodney got kind of worked up about that, but his anger was quickly focused on Mike. Oh, Mike. Mike is the son of a preacher man (this week I finally figured out that his awful back tattoo reads “Psalm 121″), and an oil rig worker. The guy has work ethic up to wazoo and a big mouth. He’s a martyr. Because, you know, it doesn’t seem like the rest of the tribe is all that lazy. It just seems like Mike can’t sit still.

Mike is already rubbing Rodney and Lindsey the wrong way. Rodney got riled up, and suddenly his issues with Mike had something, somehow, to do with the cost of owning a home in Massachusetts. Lindsey made it about never hearing “thank you”, which is ridiculous. It’s a communal camp, she shouldn’t expect to receive thanks for keeping her own camp functioning. She also shouldn’t have to take orders from Mike, because Mike is not in charge. Just like Rodney, Lindsey was all riled up over this. These people need to take, like, eight chill pills. Speaking of which…

No Collars

The No Collars returned from Tribal Council knowing that Will had changed his vote to make sure Vince was eliminated. It was a bad move, because now no one trusted Will. He’d flipped on Nina, and he’d given Joe, Jenn and Hali a reason to distrust him.

Still, Nina knew she was toast and took the opportunity to continue digging her grave by acting like a real martyr about it. Honestly, Nina. Learn to just, you know, be.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, we have Jenn. Jenn and Hali went “surfing” this week, which was really boogie boarding on pieces of driftwood but it looked hella fun. Jenn is here to have fun. “I don’t know why everyone takes this game so seriously,” she mused. BECAUSE IT IS A GAME FOR ONE MILLION DOLLARS, KIDDO. Hali is a fan of the game, so I really hope she’s just playing it under the radar right now and isn’t as much of a dope as Jenn.

There’s A Hole In My Bucket, Dear Jeff Probst

The challenge this week was once again a Reward/Immunity combo. Tribes had to transport water through an obstacle course using a bucket filled with holes. Joe on the No Collar tribe made the very poor decision of advising Nina to run ahead through the obstacle challenge, thus not helping plug the holes. It was a pointless move, because Nina easily could have helped. The No Collars tribe came in dead last.

The Blue Collars came first, and won a sweet comfort kit for camp. The White Collars won a tarp. I was pretty bummed when I was drawn last out of the Survivor pool and got assigned Dan, but it could have gone worse for me. The Blue Collars haven’t had to go to Tribal Council yet so he’s stayed in the game, and if other members of the tribe keep fighting he could squeak by for a while.

The No Collars had to choose whether to vote out Will or Nina. As Jenn put it, “they both suck in challenges.” It’s true, they’re both weak links on the tribe. Nina’s attitude is poor and brings everyone down, but Will didn’t vote like he said he would. It was a pretty close call.

Nina’s plea at Tribal Council read false to me. She doesn’t naturally fit in with this tribe, and she doesn’t know how to adjust her personality to fit in. Do you think Kelly likes the clowns over on Blue Collar? Probably not, but she’s making do. Nina can’t do that, and I don’t think anyone believed that she would try to be more free-spirited. You don’t try to be a free spirit, you just are one.

Nina was voted out, and it’s no surprise. I knew her days were numbered from the first episode. Her deafness was not the only thing that set her apart from her tribemates – I think Nina’s age and personality were the bigger obstacles there. Would she have fared better with the White Collars? Perhaps her and Shirin should have traded tribes, since I have a feeling Shirin (though being a powerful tech executive) would fit in better with the free spirits.

(I noticed that Hali voted for Will, not Nina. I assume it was because they were worried about an Idol coming into play.)

What do you guys think? Any favorite players yet? I don’t think I like anyone on the White Collar Tribe, but I think Sierra and Kelly are doing a good job of staying under the radar on Blue Collar. On White Collar, I prefer Joe and Hali to Jenn – but they’re all in trouble if they don’t start winning challenges.

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