They will make passes when you wear these glasses

L-A: So, as you know, Dorothy Parker is totally my homegirl. And for years, I’ve agreed with her on the “men don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses” (well, in theory. I’m married).

Which is to say, I thought glasses looked horrible on me. So I’ve been solidly on the contacts bandwagon (I should probably get over my fear of lasers, but I blame James Bond movie marathons. No lasers in my eyes, thankyouverymuch. I’m also cheap) for years.

But I think  we can all agree that Dorothy’s poem is bullshit. I mean really.


You see? He’s totally into bespectacled Marilyn

Because I’ve figured out my problem: I’ve been wearing the wrong glasses. You look bad when you have glasses that look bad. And now that I’ve bit the bullet and got a pair I love, I’m kind of hooked and want more glasses. I feel like more than one pair is cool. Right?

Since I’m dreaming of new pairs, my current spectacle crush is Warby Parker. Partly because the name is fun to say, partly because they have a killer philosophy (you buy a pair, they donate a pair, everyone wins), and largely because they’ve got serious style.  Check out the snazzy winter collection:


Dreamy right?



It makes me want to decorate for the holidays while looking super smart. I bet I’d call it cocoa instead of hot chocolate or drink mulled wine while wearing those glasses. I might even think scotch is a drink and not some kind of expensive poison in a nice glass (seriously, scotch drinkers, that stuff tastes like punches and poison). I’d still wear my at-home-only-leggings-as-pants, but with a great sweater. Or maybe something like this:

Where are my amazing new glasses? Let's find them and go get a tree to decorate. No, I don't need socks in winter.

“Where are my amazing new glasses? Let’s find them and go pick out a tree to decorate. No, I don’t need socks in winter.”


Basically, I’d build my great outfit around my great glasses.

My personal faves from the winter collection are Langhorn and Welty:

langhorne-optical-whiskey-tortoise-angle welty-optical-plum-marblewood-angle

Since I’ve already got a pair of tortoiseshell glasses, I’m all over the subtle plum colour happening on the Welty. I think I can get away with purple specs.

Collection timing is perfect as I know husband is ready to move on from his RayBans, so I’ll probably be sending him this as soon as I hit publish (that’s right – collection is for ladies and gents). And because, you know, let’s get new glasses before the 2013 health plans at work run out!

So Dorothy, girlfriend, I think your problem was you were wearing the wrong glasses. Probably because you wrote that poem in the 1920s or 1930s and you didn’t have a lot of choice. If I ever get a chance to time travel, I will totally bring you a pair of great glasses.

Full disclosure: Warby Parker did ask us to write about this collection, but I did so only because I truly dig the product and was seriously considering a pair before getting the email. We don’t tell you we love stuff when we don’t. That’s the FPQT Promise™. And yeah, I just made up the FPQT Promise™, but it’s the truth. 

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