Wednesday Rants: Just Say No to Leather Shorts

AllyG: Full disclosure, I was a Hillary supporter in the last election. I got over it quickly when she conceded (finally) to Barack, but I did like her, and I felt as though she was treated completely unfairly throughout the campaign. My love for Hillary was reignited today when I caught wind of her response to a reporter’s question while she was in the Congo as part of her duties as Secretary of State. Did you see this?

Of course the media response was typical for Hillary.

“Hillary loses her temper in Congo!”

“‘Bill isn’t Secretary of State, I am!’ Snaps Hillary”

And of course, the ever reliable effing FOX news declared, “Clinton’s Outburst in Congo Raises Concerns About Her Diplomatic Skills: While Secretary Clinton’s reaction to a question in Congo may not have any political repercussions, some foreign policy analysts say it reflects her limitations as a diplomat.”

Seriously? No, really. SERIOUSLY? The Wall Street Journal Blog put it best with a quote from State Department Spokesperson P.J. Crowley,  “It’s important to understand the context here: that, you know, one of — an abiding theme that she has in her trip to Africa is empowering women,” Crowley said. “As the question was posed to her, it was posed in a way that said: I want to get the views of two men, but not you, the secretary of state.”

Whatever. The student may have been nervous, may have meant to say Obama, whatever, whatever. Point is she is in the Congo in the role of Secretary of State and she was essentially asked to be a ventriliquist dummy for her husband. She had every right to speak out as she did.

I know this is a fashion blog, so I’ll move on. Before I do, I’d like to dedicate a little ditty to my girl Hills.

You know what else ticks me off? LEATHER SHORTS. Apparently, these are “hot” for Fall, so much so that they were seen on the Chloe F09 runway.

Chloe leather shorts

Wtf? Chloe?

Leanne Delap wrote about this in the Globe back in March in a sweet article titled, “Leather shorts? It’s a French-girl Thing”. She apparently supports the leather short movement. At least while in France. Agree to disagree.

The beautiful Ashley Greene (From Twighlight fame) tries to pull off the long and almost succeeds. But still…they are leather shorts. Like, the chafing alone is reason enough to leave these on the hanger.

ashley greene July 16

L-A, did you know Ashley was seen making out with Chace Crawford a day after the Teen Choice Awards? Apparently, he dropped her off to the airport and they were doing the smooch. This is one degree of seperation from Chuck Bass. I ain’t lie telling.

Not even Angelina could look acceptable in leather shorts. She can, however, handle a leather dress quite well.


Hate her.

And lastly, for my Wednesday rant (Sorry, I promise this won’t become a regular thing), STFU KATHY GRIFFIN.

L-A: mmmm…Chuck Bass….


…wait. What? You also mentioned important things. Like Hillary and leather shorts. Although, for the love of all things holy, I hope that’s the closest those two ever come together. Seriously Hills. I love you and your moxie. I’m glad you told the reporter to take a leap for asking what your husband thinks. Your husband does, I’m sure, Think Very Important Thoughts, but unless the press conference is about Bill’s Very Important Thoughts On Matters of Importance, then no one should be asking you what he thinks. (p.s. I have a couple of Vote Hillary pins. Including a gay pride vote Hillary pin. Sometimes I really do love America).  But please Hillary, never ever go near a pair of leather shorts. Not even if it’s in Germany and the fate of the Free World rests on you wearing Liederhosen. It ain’t worth it. Because while I barely like your pantsuits (actually, it’s more a case of “I tolerate your pantsuits because I love you and your moxie and your smarts make you pretty”), you never want to be caught in a moment like this one:


Seriously. That moment was uncomfortable for everyone. The only time I didn’t cringe to see that photo is when it was turned into a hilarious postcard by Halifax artist Tacha Reid.

But you know what, I am totally iffy on leather. This is not an animal rights thing. My trouble is, sure it can look absolutely awesome, but mostly, it is a complete and utter fail (see Harper, Stephen; leather vest). I am firmly of the opinion that unless it is Oktoberfest in Dusseldorf, no one should be sporting Liederhosen shorts.  Yet, Serious Designers try to tell us otherwise. Like Givenchy:


(found via Jak&Jil blog)

What in the name of what now? Men’s formal leather shorts with men’s leggings, paired with crazy gladiator sandals that include velcro?? No. Nononono. That gives me nightmares.  Alexander Wang also thinks it’s okay:


Those shorts are a bit of a no-no.  But with that designer gym shirt, they are a definite No Thank You, Not Ever.

Leanne Delap might think it’s okay for French girls to sport these short leather pants, but even that is a stretch. Here is evidence from the Jak & Jil blog, a shot taken in Paris:


Because of the overall look of the outfit, and possibly because she has French genes in her favour, those leather shorts get a barely pass.

And you know what else: I don’t even like the leather dress sported by Angelina Jolie.  Part of the problem is maybe that I have serious Brad/Angelina as a couple of issues. Secondly, I really don’t get the big deal about Angelina. I don’t think she’s that hot. And in the picture Ally posted, I’m not loving the dress. I’m just not. I hope for her sake that it’s been a cool summer in LA or she Botoxed the shit out of her sweat glands.

Oh! And that’s my other problem with leather shorts: leather. in summer. Really? Have you ever sat on a leather seat in summer while wearing shorts or a skirt? Well that’s what I’m thinking wearing leather shorts would be like. Except all the time!

So, I’m going to Vote No on leather shorts.

And back to Hills for a sec, a video that makes me love her and Tina Fey even more (which, seriously, I didn’t think was possible). Sadly, NBC has made it so that it is (a) flash based and (b) only Americans can watch this video. You are a pain in my ass NBC. It’s stuff like this that makes me not watch SNL.

For the rest of us, there is the memories of the video before it was yanked off YouTube and a transcript:

TINA FEY: Maybe what bothers me the most is that people say that Hillary is a bitch. Let me say something about that: Yeah, she is. So am I and so is this one. [Points to Amy Poehler]

AMY POEHLER: Yeah, deal with it.

TINA FEY: You know what, bitches get stuff done. That’s why Catholic schools use nuns as teachers and not priests. Those nuns are mean old clams and they sleep on cots and they’re allowed to hit you. And at the end of the school year you hated those bitches but you knew the capital of Vermont. So, I’m saying it’s not too late Texas and Ohio, bitch is the new black!


We are totally like Tina and Amy. Only they are slightly more political and more consistently funny. And get paid to be funny. We do it for free because we love fashion and because we love you.

p.s. what was that Kathy Griffin crap? Why was she at the Teen Choice Awards? And why was she there with a teenage boy no one cares about? She could have at least taken someone remotely relevant, like Wee Jonas.  I managed to watch about two minutes of that video, vomited on my keyboard and moved on. And one final question: Why CNN? That was too low brow for E-Talk Daily or even for TMZ, but Larry King thought it would be the shit?  WTF?

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